KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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