Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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