I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
