In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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