You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
