Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
