it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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