Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
