yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
