you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Fuck appropriateness.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
