During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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