do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
