The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
