That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
FUCK WHALES
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
please don't ironically join a cult
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