What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
