His pubic hair was longer than his dick
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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