i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
