Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
