is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
they're like a gay fantastic four
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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