If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
