so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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