i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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