Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(757): View more from Virginia

this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial

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(330): View more from Ohio

That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.

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(217): View more from Illinois

Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..

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(951): View more from California

Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him

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(307): View more from Wyoming

I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor

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