Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
