THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
