I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
