try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
