Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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