Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
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