Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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