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just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
