dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
