he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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