She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
