Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
