I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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