She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
