i jhust puked up my retainher.
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
