You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
