It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
