I smell stomach acid.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize