Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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