You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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