Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
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