Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
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