yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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