so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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