I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
