I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
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