so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
